Squirrels are Evil!

One Dog -- One Mission: To uncover the Great Squirrel Conspiracy

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

my side of the story

well dog friends, since nobody seems to be able to interpret my benjamin's writing i guess i need to tell what happened.

my peepol all went for a long ride in the car wifout ivy and they were gone so long it got dark and it wuz past dinnertime and past bedtime wen they all got home. i said wut happened? why did i miss my dinner?? and my randy said he wuz so sorry but traffic wuz reelly bad. i said that if traffic wuz so bad then traffic shud haf missed dinner, not ivy! but of corse nobody wuz lissening to ivy. my randy put ben to bed before he even fed me.

so the next day i looked at the picktures on my dog camera and there are cats and ben wif beer! wuts up wif that? my peepol told me that ben didnt get any beer he just liked to hold the can cuz it wuz pretty. i knew i shud haf gone along. i wuddent haf let cats or beer near my baby ben!

in the cat pickture you can see ben wearing his new bib. this is the coolest bib ever cuz it catches all the yummy food and then i get to lick it off!

gee, i wunder if that cat got to lick the bib cuz i wuzent there? i bet he did. stupid cat!
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Monday, May 26, 2008




(that wuz my benjamin writing about his advenchures on saturday. i will tell my side of the story later)
luv ivy

Sunday, May 18, 2008

my dog sleeping lessons worked!

my benjamin learned an important lesson. a good dog can sleep ANYWHERE.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

lost a whisker, gained some carrots

well dog friends, you were rite! you all kept telling me to watch out for benjamin's little hands but i thot you were joking... the little guy couldn't hurt anyone with those little tiny fingers, so i thot.

but then the other day i wuz coming in to lick his face (his face always tastes so good!) and he reached out and pulled one of my whiskers rite out of my nose!! yowzers! that hurt!

i wuz reelly good and i didnt bite or growl. i just cried a bit and made sure not to get close again. i asked my randy why my sweet little benjamin wuz so mean and he said that poor ben didn't have any whiskers of his own and he just wanted to borrow one of mine to try it out. i guess that makes sense.

but today he made it up to me. he wuz eating sumthing brite and orange and he seemed to be reelly luving it!

it looked like it must be so good so i stood close and let my benjamin know that i wanted to try some too.

and guess wut? my baby ben shared wif me! it turned out to be just carrots (why are they feeding the poor boy carrots anyway?) but i ate them all up anyway to be polite.

i told my benjamin thank you for the yummy carrots and that he could keep all the rest of them... and my whisker, too.
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Thursday, May 01, 2008

My house got a new ruff!

my peepol haf been all excited and weird and stuff lately. my lindsay took down all the picktures and mirrors from the walls and then they chopped up the last holly tree from in front of our house (i will haf to tell you more about that one later!)

i wondered why my peepol were acting so strangely and i asked them to explain themselves but of course they didnt lissen to me or answer any of my questions. i just had to keep my ears up and finally i heard that my house was getting a new ruff! woo hoo! how cool! hey, wut is a new ruff anyway?

i found out soon enuf! these four guys showed up in a giant truck early in the morning and started making an awful racket in my house. it sounded like my house wuz under attack! i scooted out into my backyard to keep an eye on them from a safe distance!

so now my house has a new ruff. i am just glad that those guys didn't try to change my ruff!!