thank you thank you thank you to dogtective joe stains! he found evidence of the real culprits and cleared me of all charges.
so it wuz cats all this time!! i shudda known. i thot it wuz skwerrels cuz i haf made sum cat friends recently and they seemed not so bad but i gess you just cant trust a cat.
incidentally it seems that the evil cats hid the evidence of theyr crime in a corner of my benjamin's vibrating rocky-chair, ware my lindsay found it about an hour ago. sneaky cats!
thanks to my excellent dog friends! i luv you joe stains!